To start the conversation, I’m pulling up a line from one of my favorite poets, Kahlil Gibran.
“The oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.”
The context in this piece is marriage, but I do believe this can be applied in friendships too. Gibran talked about having space in togetherness.
I must admit, I love people, and spending time with my friends is one of my favorite things to do. But the closer I lean towards adulthood, I’m realizing that practicing solitude makes a person dive deeper into his or her individuality, therefore, knowing himself or herself more.
For sure, being surrounded by people who champion you will help you push forward. But at the end of the day, they are just witnesses, like an audience holding up a banner within the barricades while you run towards your own race.
The danger is when you start to hear yourself saying you don’t need people.
So, be careful out there.
Remember, Jesus asked his disciples to go with him to the garden of Gethsemane before crucifixion even if He knows they’ll just fall asleep. Jesus’ agenda is to talk to the Father, and this will be fulfilled even if He chose to come alone. Yet, He asked Peter, James, and John to accompany Him.
That’s humility and vulnerability.
That being said, there will always be a push and pull between solitude and togetherness. The only way to ease the tension is by putting them in the same team.
Easier said than done though.
Good news is, Jesus made everything beautiful in its time.
There’s a time when we miss the people we used to see almost every day to make time for the new ones.
Like a body of water going left and right, touching one side of the shore while leaving the other side dry for a while.
There’s a time of silence, those moments when you just let everything in and sit down with your friends aka your emotions.
Like you’re a team looking for words to fill in the pages of a book.
There’s a time when everything is warm, as in things are going your way.
Like the feeling of a hug from someone you love after a long day.
In its time, the Lord declares everything as beautiful.
And we could sit down with that fact.
So let the sun hit your face or the rain drops touch your skin once in a while.
They are made beautiful in their time.